6 Reasons Reasons why revenge ch.e.a.t.i.n.g is not a good idea
1. You can think differently when things get cold
When you feel torn and betrayed, revenge after infidelity seems acceptable. Acting out of anger and hurt does not make you the best decision maker. So when you have some space, and things cool down, you may want to take your actions back. So give yourself some time before acting on any rash thoughts.
2. They may use you to justify their behavior
Your betrayal for revenge can be used as an argument to prove that what they did is nothing huge, since you also did the same thing. They may even ask for forgiveness because now things are evened out. Revenge adultery helps the person who betrayed you to feel less guilty about their actions and to ask for more understanding.
Revenge for betrayal will not bring you the peace you seek. It will not lessen the pain; rather, it will only build up into more anger and bitterness that you have to deal with.
3. You may resent yourself for it
You will not feel good knowing that you did the exact same thing that hurt you immensely in the first place. Ch.e.a.t.i.n.g will not lessen your hurt. It will just build up into more anger and bitterness that you will have to deal with.
4. Hurting them will not reduce their hurt.
Revenge of any kind rarely brings peace. Revenge, only for a short period of time, will most likely help you feel less pain, but it will build up into something else to overcome in the long run. Revenge will do nothing to help you deal with the feelings or make a plan to get over it.
5. Reduces the chances of reconciliation
Revenge on a ch.e.a.t.er deteriorates the chances of a marriage surviving infidelities. If you think there is a way to make it work, limit revenge to ch.e.a.t.i.n.g. To give reconciliation a chance, you need to address the root cause of the problems.
6. Your confidence will go ping pong
When you have an affair of your own, you may feel more desired and attractive for a short period of time. It may help you see that there are other fish in the sea and know that you have options.
For a moment, you will renew your sense of self-worth and feel a slight relief. However, soon other feelings will set in.
At that point, the confidence you have acquired will deflate, and all the feelings you have tried to avoid will come rushing back up.
Choose your next steps carefully
Revenge ch.e.a.t.i.n.g won’t give you peace. If you want to feel better, deal with the pain, shame, and anger you feel, be kind to yourself, and give yourself time to process it before making any rash decisions.
Source:timesofindia.indiatimes.com, marriage.com, aconsciousrethink.com