Negotiating a divorce settlement while cruising down a highway is a high-stakes game, especially when one party holds a complete monopoly on the vehicle’s safety features.
A married couple was driving along a quiet stretch of highway, maintaining a steady 40 mph with the husband behind the wheel. Suddenly, the wife cleared her throat. “Look, after twenty years, I want a divorce.”
The husband said absolutely nothing. He kept his eyes locked on the asphalt but slowly pressed the gas, accelerating to 45 mph.
Emboldened, the wife continued, “And don’t bother trying to win me back. I’ve been having an affair with your best friend, and frankly, he’s a much better lover.”
The husband’s grip tightened on the steering wheel until his knuckles turned white. The speedometer crept up to 55 mph.
“I’m keeping the house,” she added aggressively.
The car hit 60 mph.
“I want the sedan, the savings accounts, and the boat, too!” she demanded, completely oblivious to the world outside.
At 65 mph, the car began veering directly toward a massive concrete bridge support. Realizing they weren’t slowing down, the wife panicked. “Aren’t you even going to fight for anything?! Isn’t there anything you want?!”
The husband finally turned to her, his voice chillingly calm, and flashed a serene smile just a split-second before impact:
“No, I’m good. I’ve already got the only thing I need: the airbag.”
