While undergoing a major operation, a middle-aged woman had a near-death vision of God. Seizing the moment, she asked, “Lord, how many more years do I have left to live?”
God smiled and replied, “You have exactly 30 years, 2 months, and 4 days.”
Overjoyed by the news, the woman decided to make the absolute most of her remaining decades. The moment she recovered from surgery, she stayed in the clinic and booked a total transformation: a facelift, liposuction, a tummy tuck, lip fillers, and a completely new hair color.
Feeling absolutely glamorous and decades younger, she finally strutted out of the hospital doors. But as she was confidently crossing the street to catch a cab, a speeding ambulance hit her, killing her instantly.
Arriving at the Pearly Gates, she stormed up to God and demanded, “You promised me I had over thirty more years to live! Why didn’t you save me from that car?!”
God squinted at her, scratched His head, and shrugged. “To be perfectly honest, customizer… I didn’t recognize you!”
