This divorced man wrote some beautiful marriage advice that every man should read
A psychologist who went through a difficult divorce, wrote an amazing Facebook post about life, love, relationships, and divorce. He began by saying, “After losing a woman I loved, and a marriage of almost 16 years, here’s the advice I wish I had had…”. This is his advice…
1. Choose love.
In the end, this is the only advice you need. If this is the guiding principle by which all your choices are governed, there is nothing that threatens the happiness of your marriage. Love will always endure.
2. Never stop courting. Never stop courting.
NEVER take that woman for granted. When you asked her to marry you promised to be the man who would have her heart and fiercely protect it. This is the most important and sacred treasure you will ever be entrusted with. SHE YOU CHOOSE. Never forget that, and NEVER LAY in your love.
3. Always grow together.
The stagnant lake breeds malaria, the flowing stream is always fresh and cool. Atrophy is the natural process when you stop working a muscle, just as it happens if you stop working on your relationship. Find common goals, dreams and visions to work towards.
4. Don’t sweat the money.
Money is a game, find ways to work together as a team to earn it. It never helps when teammates fight. Find ways to harness the strength of both people to win.
5. Allow yourself to be vulnerable.
You don’t have to have it all together. Be willing to share your fears and feelings, and quick to acknowledge your mistakes.
6. Be open and transparent.
If you want to have trust, you must be willing to share EVERYTHING: especially the things you don’t want to share. It takes courage to love fully, to fully open your heart and let her in when you don’t know I’m going to like what she finds…. Part of that courage is to allow her to love you fully, both your darkness and your light. DROP THE MASK: If you feel you need to wear a mask around her, and always appear perfect, you will never experience the full extent of what love can be.
7. Don’t be stupid
Don’t be an idiot, and don’t be afraid to be one either. You will make mistakes and so will she. Try not to make too many mistakes, and learn from the ones you make. You’re not supposed to be perfect, just try not to be too stupid.
8. Protect your heart.
Just as you have committed to being the protector of her heart, you must protect yours with the same vigilance. Love yourself fully, love the world openly, but there is a special place in your heart where no one should enter except your wife. Keep that space always ready to welcome her and invite her in, and refuse to let anyone or anything else enter there.
9. Fall in love every day.
You will change constantly. You will not be the same person you were when you got married, and in five years you will not be the same person you are today. Change will come, and in the sense that you will have to re-select each other every day. SHE DOESN’T HAVE TO STAY WITH YOU, and if you don’t take care of your heart, she may give that heart to someone else or seal it up completely, and you may never get it back. Always fight to win her love just as you did when you courted her.
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