When we are at our most vulnerable, we hope that family will catch us. However, one woman shared a devastating experience with us about how, instead of receiving assistance following a serious surgery, she was rejected. Her encounter caused her to reconsider all she thought she understood about love, devotion, and what it means to belong.
Here’s what she told us.
After undergoing surgery, I spent several days alone in a hospital bed, healing slowly and hoping for a friendly face to walk through the door. But no family came. Not my brother. Not my sister-in-law.
I told myself it was fine. Maybe they were busy, or didn’t realize how serious things were.
When I recovered, I went home. My SIL opened the door, eyes wide, and froze in the doorway. Then, as if I were a stranger, she grabbed her phone and threatened to call the police because I wasn’t welcome there anymore.
She said, “You paid for nothing here. You had money and didn’t even tell us. The only thing you own in this house is your body—so go out and enjoy it!”
I stood frozen, unable to speak. She said that she could prove I was a stranger in this house. Just because I hadn’t paid rent or covered household expenses recently, she said I had no right to be there.
The truth is, I really had saved that much money—but it was for my surgery.
I didn’t pay the bills only for a few months, but did that make a difference to “your family”? And I’d always contributed before that.
Now, my brother and SIL had a big fight because my brother claims that kicking me out is over the line. I am afraid that their marriage might be in jeopardy because of me, I feel so guilty.
What should I do? Am I really a stranger now? Is money the only thing that defines whether you’re “family”?
