St. Peter’s Logic Was Making Everyone Nervous
Three friends — two straight guys and a g*y guy — and their significant others were on a cruise.
A tidal wave came up and swamped the ship; they all drowned, and next thing you know, they’re standing before St. Peter.
First came one of the straight guys and his wife.
St. Peter shook his head sadly. “I can’t let you in. You loved money too much.
You loved it so much, you even married a woman named Penny.”
Then came the second straight guy. “Sorry, can’t let you in, either. You loved food too much.
You loved to eat so much, you even married a woman named Candy!”
The gay guy turned to his boyfriend and whispered nervously, “It doesn’t look good, D*ck.”
Bonus Joke
Fred gets home late one night and his wife,
Linda, says, “Where in the hell have you been?”
“I was out getting a tattoo,” Fred replied.
“A tattoo?” she frowned.
“What kind of tattoo did you get?”
“I got a hundred dollar bill tattooed on my privates,” he said proudly.
“What the hell were you thinking?” she said, shaking her head in disdain.
“Why on earth would an accountant get a hundred dollar bill tattooed on his privates?”
“Well, for one, I like to watch my money grow,” said Fred.
“Two, once in a while I like to play with my money.
“Three, I like how money feels in my hand.
“And, lastly, instead of you going out shopping, you can stay right here at home and blow a hundred bucks anytime you want.”
